Junior Birdman



It’s no secret that the Athleta catalog is considered soft porn in the suburbs by most men and I can see why.  To many women, the Athleta catalog serves as great motivation towards beauty, fitness, and strength.  Looks aside, I would love to build myself to be stronger than I’ve ever been, and thanks to Crossfit, I think I am on my way (and thank you to my husband Gordie for the encouragement).  After twenty years in a traditional gym, I’m doing something much harder and more beneficial for my body type than the usual repertoire of classes.  I’m amazed with what I’ve been able to learn in just 8 weeks.  

One of my first big goals came today: mastering a handstand in preparation to (eventually) do handstand push-ups.  This was a major accomplishment from the girl who does crooked cartwheels and never even learned how to do a round-off.  

The first attempts were a series of debacles, primarily my ramming my head into the wall as I tried to kick up.  “Try to be gentle with the wall,” the trainer said in a concerned voice.  “We’ve had some issues with shaking the walls and knocking down the artwork in the office next door,”  Fabulous.  I listened often for the sound of shattering glass, but somehow, perhaps, I got lucky. 

Once I finally got comfortable with the kick-up, I had trouble with the landing.  More than a few times, I almost nailed my neighbor in the face as my heels came smashing down, totally out of alignment.  Mary Lou Retton wouldn’t have even instructed me in a beginning tumbling clinic without my signing several waivers.

Worried that I would never get it, I pressed on.  Today, I did it!  I was upside down, looking back at the wall behind me, with the sudden impulse to belt out the words to “Junior Birdman”, but I refrained, because multi-tasking in the headstand is not quite in my realm of capabilities.  Not yet, anyway.  

“Up in the air, Junior Birdman 
Up in the air, upside down 
Is it a bird, plane or Superman? 
No It’s Junior Birdman upside down.”

I’ve never been in a true handstand in my entire life and I am already looking forward to trying it again soon.  As I tell my kids all the time, “You’ll never know if you don’t try!”





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